A puppy’s days are busy…

1. Be taken outside to go potty. Don’t go potty.  Chase leaves, bite leash, roll in something suspicious and smelly. Eat a stick. This is the ticket back inside.
2. Run to Christmas tree. Pull off ornament. Play chase until they catch you and take it away. Run to the backside of tree. Drink water from the bucket. Get pulled out by tail. Snatch light string on way out and tip entire tree until someone shrieks. Get told no and sent away.
3. Come back to steal bow off package.
4. Wake up old dog by jumping on him. Start him barking and chasing you.
5. Sit down for one–blessed–minute–to fool everyone.
6. Jump into person’s lap, simultaneously spilling tea, ripping book, and proving you can jump that high.
7. Run to door. They have to take you out.
8. Don’t go potty. Pad through puddles to get really wet. Find dry worms and eat them. Person will get grossed out and take you back inside.
9. Go to Christmas tree and pee on presents.
10. Repeat.